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New To Hashing? Come Join Us!

Hash House Harriers (or HHH, H3 or also called Hashing)

Is simply an international group of non-competitive running social clubs. An event organized by a club is known as a hash or hash run, with participants calling themselves hashers or hares and hounds.

It is not a drug reference.
It is not a bizarre sex cult.
It is not a secret society.

It is a place for people that enjoy a good time, get a little exercise while having a laugh and feeling free to be a little juvenile without being judged.

Preparing for your first hash

After you’ve decided this is for you, you may be wondering how to get started. That’s the easy part. Check out the calendar, find an even that works with your schedule and show up. We won’t even ask you to pay the first time.

Fitness: You don’t need to be a runner or even fast. Most of us aren’t! We are an eclectic group with a wide variety of abilities. We have hashers that are thin, overweight, college age, middle-aged parents who struggle to get the gym semi-regularly and retirees. Some like to run “events with medals”, but hashers firmly believe, race is a four letter word and “race”-ism is wrong.

Attire: Nothing nice! Certainly don’t wear any  clothes you got from a 5K or half-marathon. Something you won’t mind when it gets dirty, or pulled on jaggers (we call it shiggy). Because that WILL happen. But it’s all part of the fun. Avoid new shoes. Looking like you are ready for a fashion show puts too much focus that you are a serious athlete and you may get a good-natured ribbing about it.

Whistle: Bring a whistle! All hashers should, but they rarely listen to what they are told. Some people’s kids… They are used to signal to other hashers you have found the right way to go or, if you get lost, you signal for help. But like most outdoor activities, we suggest “the buddy system” and stick with your buddy.  That way if we have to send a search party we get a two for one deal. 😉

Flashlight: Usually the hares will be generous enough to suggest if you will need a flashlight to make it back safely. But if you think you my need one, it’s a good idea to carry something to light the way. Good news is, these days, LED flashlights are very light and easy to carry. If you are going to come out to many dark trails, invest in a nice headlamp, you’ll appreciate being hands-free and are awesome if you decide on a camp out.

After: A dry bag is always a good idea with a change of clothes including socks. Fording a stream is not uncommon and there is always some sort of social gathering afterward. May as well be comfortable.

Hash Ambassadors: It can be daunting showing up somewhere without knowing anyone. Drag a friend  along if you like. We always love sharing our “sport” with new people and the more the merrier.

If you check out the mismangement page, you will find a list of people who are dedicated to helping h5 keep rolling and would be happy to help guide you how to get started.

Trail Marks

Dot
Dot
: Flour dot. This is a mark that may indicate you are headed in the right direction.

Checking-Circle
Check
: These can be in flour or chalk. At this mark, the trail can go in any direction. It’s up to the pack to find the proper direction.

False
False
: This mark is laid by the hare. It means that you are going the wrong way. Go back to the check and try a different direction.

Beer Near
Beer Near & Shot Near
: Beverage stop… take a break and join up with the pack.

Checkback
Check Back
: Count back the number of dots listed and that dot is now a check.

True Trail
True Trail
: This mark is only laid by the hare. It means the correct way to go is this direction. The pack can lay an arrow to indicate someone went in a direction but the three slash tail arrow is reserved for the hare.

Boob Check
Boob Check
: Men must stop at this symbol. Only women can go look for true trail and the men can follow after. If the ladies want help finding trail… they have the option to ask for help. You’ll see when you get there.

Naughty
Naughty Check
: An intersection check where the first person must stop and assume the “spanking” position. The next person give them a swat on the butt and takes there spot while the first person goes and looks for trail. It’s a fun way to bring the pack back together.

There could be other marks too, but the hare will (should) explain them before they head off for trail.

Just come… and have fun with us!

H5 Events Calendar on your Smartphone

First off… I have heard a number of frustrations about the way that events are listed on h5hash.com. Believe me.. I hear you and I understand. I’ve had some issues with the plugin I had on the website that is limited in what we need it to do. I’ve tweaked and messed with it. So, I said eff it. There has to be an easier way.

So, I’m now embedding a Google Calendar on the page. So people should be more easily see what’s going on. They can go forward and backward. Events won’t disappear after the event begins.

I have the change posted now. Please take a moment and let me know if you see something odd.

What is even cooler with this calendar… if you are an iPhone user (not sure if other smart phones support this but I’m sure you can easily google it or check with your manufacturer)… You can add this calendar to your iphone calendar and you’ll always be up to date.

This also works with applications that support ICAL file format.

Here is the subscribed address for your device:
http://www.google.com/calendar/ical/harrisburghersheyh3%40gmail.com/public/basic.ics

As far as how do you set this up on the iPhone… here are the directions I blatantly stole off some guys blog…

How to Subscribe to an iCalendar Server/.ICS feed [iPhone]
iCalendar is an older calendar subscription format, and many servers offer .ICS feeds of calendar entries. I particularly love TripIt‘s free travel itinerary service, which is available as an ICS feed. iPhone OS 3.0 also includes iCal as a supported protocol for over-the-air subscription, so you can view your ICS feeds right in your phone calendar. Note that iCalendar is read-only, like an RSS feed, so you cannot create or edit items on the phone.
1. copy this URL
http://www.google.com/calendar/ical/harrisburghersheyh3%40gmail.com/public/basic.ics

2. ummm…
3. Go back to the home screen and select “Settings”
4. Select “Mail, Contacts, Calendars”
5. Select”Add Account…” under “Accounts”
6. Select “Other” at the bottom
7. Select “Add Subscribed Calendar”
8. Select the “Server” box and tap “Paste”
9. Select “Next”
10. Optionally modify the description

PongDeck

I’d like to thank the fine people at Pong Deck for sending me a set of their Pong Deck cards for our next “serious on-in”. These are pretty cool. It’s a deck of cards that are used to “enhance” the game of Beer Pong. We’ll have to sort out our rules and teams for next event!

What’s in a hash name?

Contributed by Burnt Sox (Mt. Vernon H3) to the internet

I had a vision, a vision of the Hash name in its full glory and honor.

Blessed is the Hash Name. It allows the Hasher to flaunt law, ordinance and custom of society in relative anonymity. It also makes rejection much easier: “Get your tongue off me, Bridle Shower,” is softer on the ego than, “Not on your life, Steve.” All Hash names are honorable, as are most Hashers. There are no rules to Hash names, but as within the Hash, there is a sense of honor.

The most honored of all Hash name is the Gifted. The Gifted name arises from a Hash event involving the Gifted Hasher, and the name itself is funny, yea, one might even say witty. Witness Oar-A-Face, who on her first Hash was hit in the face with an oar by someone trying to make a good impression on her. Note the near intelligence: Oar-A-Face sounds like “orifice.” Witness John Handcock, named in honor of his failure to sign in at the Hash in a futile effort to avoid being named. Witness Amkneesia, who broke her knee during a Hash party but was so drunk she doesn’t remember how. This, it is said, is the type of Hash name to which we all aspire. Unfortunately,it doesn’t happen that often.

Next most honored is the Headliner. The Headliner name reports a Hash incident involving the subject Hasher, but the name lacks cleverness or originality. Witness Slick Slit, who during a Hash party demonstrated that she really does shave. Indeed, witness Burnt Sox,named when he burned his socks in an oven while trying to dry them after a Hash. Yes, the Headliner is noble because it does invoke the Hash, but its stimulus-response derivation separates it from the Gifted.

Next most honored is the Hale-Bopp name, which arises from a special, one-time Hash event that is never to be repeated. These opportunities, when they arise, must be seized upon. Witness Dahmer, named on the day the Hash retired its bulky, coffin-sized beer cooler. And witness Troll, named on a day the trail ended under a bridge. These names are especially honored because someone must be sober and awake enough to notice the special event.

Next most honored is the Speaking in Tongues name. The Speaking in Tongues name arises from an unfortunate statement made on the Hash by the Hasher, a statement unfortunate enough to merit naming. Witness Wide Open, whose Hash was considering naming him. He explained himself and his background, then ended by saying, “If you have any ideas for a Hash name, I’m wide open.” Ten seconds later, he was Wide Open. Similarly, witness Crack Shot, in a discussion of the standard two-person chug, commented that she’d prefer the Rumson one-man method because she trusts her butt more than anyone else’s. Yea, witness Lick It Off, Baby, who, in an unfortunate moment, yelled this phrase when beer was dripping from her vessel. The Speaking in Tongues name is honorable, particularly if it is clever, but in the search for such a name, many a hasher will spend months saying stupid things hoping to convert one to a name.

Observe: it is the rare Hash name that falls into only one category.Witness Crack Shot, who after learning of the Rumson one-man butt chug, commented that she’d prefer that method because she trusts her butt more than anyone else’s. Now, the name arose from what she said on the Hash, but the Hash engaged its collective mind here and went one step further to something witty. This is honorable. Next most honored is the Got a Life name, which arises from a non-Hash related hobby or past time of the Hasher. Witness Pitstop, a fan of auto racing who also has the tiniest bladder on the Hash. Witness Lady Bugger, who plays on an adult soccer team called the Ladybugs. Witness Patio Furniture, who is Irish and stays out all night. The Got a Life name, while it does not arise from the Hash, is nonetheless honored because it shows that someone has been paying enough attention to the Hasher to find out more.

Next most honored is the Plastic Surgery name, which refers to a distinguishing (and, if possible, disfiguring) physical characteristic of the Hasher. Witness Owwwww, who has a stud through his penis, Broken Trojan, reputedly the best-endowed man at Interam ’97, and Sweet Cheeks, the plethora of whom all have sweet cheeks. Witness Heart On, who has a tattoo of a heart on her groin, and Hairy Buddha, who looks not unlike a hairy Buddha. The Plastic Surgery name is honored, but may have to be changed if the Hasherstarts really running or has radical corrective surgery.

Next most honored is the Come at Will name, with the word “come” in it. While it should be the desire of every Hasher not to talk about sex more than having it, for most Hashers talk is about as good as it gets. And so, if someone remarks that she Seldom Cumz, or that he Comes when he(In A)Can, or that she Comes on a Whim, go with the moment.

Note that the reliance on the word “come” makes this name less honored than the true Speaking in Tongues, but the Come at Will is honorable all the same. Witness 7 Minute Blow Job, who unfortunately remarked among a group of Hashers talking about their racing (drink!) times that a 7-minute blow job would be more interesting than a 7-minute mile. Yes, she mentioned sex, but the name is more honored without the word “come.” And so, a heavy reliance on “coming” tarnishes the name, though it is not bad thing in actual sex.

Next most honored is the Name Yo’ Mama Gave Ya, which is based on, asthe name suggests, the name your mother gave you. Witness Stained Sheetz, whose mother’s last name is Sheets, or Kimo-I-Wanna-Lai-Ya, a Hasher of Hawaiian descent whose first name is Kimo. This is also the honor borne by Hashes that do not name, such as the Mother Hash and the D.C. Men’s Hash.

Amid the revelations, a caution: the Happily Ever After name, given to one Hasher based on his or her association with another Hasher.Consider that if the association ends, both parties will certainly keep Hashing. And who wants to go to the Hash to be reminded of that asshole who isn’t making child support payments or the bitch who stole most of my Police CD’s? But I digress, because there can still be honor in the Happily Ever After Name. Witness Legal Tender, the daughter of Blank Check, who came to be named on her eighteenth birthday.

Next most honored is the Fruit of Our Labor (FOOL) name, a name derived from the occupation of the Hasher in real life. (That is,when he or she is not Hashing.) This, like any other name, is honored, but if a name must focus on that which we seek to escape, might I suggest that the naming is premature? Having said that,witness Pocket Scientist, who is a researcher for a space development agency and Rut Ro, who is a special education teacher. If the Hash must bestow a FOOL name, at least make it a clever one.

Next most honored is Barbra Streisand. If the Hash fails to determine a name, it should stop trying, drink more beer, and go home. If the effort persists, however, Barbra Streisand is the universally abhorred fall-back name. But it is a name, nonetheless, and it too is to be honored.

Next most honored is the Dirty Ethnic Slur. This name may amuse those already in the Hash, but in my experience no one has returned to the Hash after receiving the Dirty Ethnic Slur. Witness Short Cunt, a woman who solved the Buffalo H3’s trails but couldn’t figure out the mentality. Witness 7-11, a Hasher of Pakistani descent, who never returned after naming. Consider the possibility of Spic ‘n’ Span, a woman of Ecuadorian descent who refrained from Hashing even though she was named Spanish Thighs in the end. Indeed, the mere spectre of the Dirty Ethnic Slur is powerful enough, and this name, though barely honored, should be used sparingly and only with evil purpose. Having so cautioned, a Hasher’s background can certainly be used for a Plastic Surgery name, but it must be done carefully. Witness White Lightning, a white guy who tried but failed to keep pace with Byte Lightning, a black guy.

In time, Hashers may be renamed, but only with good cause. Thefore most reason is that if the Hasher has paraphernalia personalized with his or her name, it’s a pain in the ass to have to change everything. When renaming, the Hash should seek to advance the name toward a more honored state. Thus, it was honorable to rename Hooked on Forensics(a FOOL name for a Hasher who performed forensic research) to French Toasted(a Gifted name earned when he got so drunk on a Hash pub crawl he started speaking French, to the exclusion of his native English). And it would be honorable to rename Cradle Robber to Episiostomy, in light of his experience at Interam’97. He ran into a tree on Trail and opened a huge gash in his head that was stitched shut by the only doctor available–a gynecologist. In this case, the renaming is most honored and to be encouraged. By the same token ,names that are less honorable should not be substituted for the more honorable.

And so the honor of the Hash Name was revealed to me.

And so it is bestowed upon the Hash.