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Tech On Trail

Written by: Kitten Mittens, Post Master Genital or whatever his name is this month)

Do you think your at a party?
Do you think your at work?
You are at a fucking hash trail.
You stupid fuckin jerk.
Why’d ya have to get your fuckin phone out?
While you were doing trail
Now that you are back in circle you can drink a cup of ale

( Drink in down and down to the tune of the song)

Harrisburg-Hershey’s 19th Anal-versary and first AGM

68 awesome H5ers and visitors joined in celebration of Harrisburg-Hershey’s 19th Anal-versary. We enjoyed great beer and food, got our formal photos taken by Squeeze Me, gave out some awards, enjoyed awesome cocktails mixed up by our very own Just Astin, and of course the ever popular music from Bubba with Tour De Puke and a special guest appearance by “Tom Arnold” on the drums. The highlight of the evening, though, had to be a great comedic look at the “year in rear-view” and roast of our newest sexygenarian (Bushrat) by Brown Noser. There was dancing and merriment and those of us who closed down the bar had a great round of Glorious, Victorious. Yet somehow people have rallied and made it to BDS today! So much talent and energy in this Hash. H5 truly does rock!
We had technical difficulties and could not project photos that our Hash Flash Pork Your Parents put together, so check them out in the facebook album H5 2015-2016 Year in pictures.
Most Hares (Control Freak): Bushrat
Most Hashes (Get a Life): Tour
Milestone Awards: 250 run Mug-Purple Cooter, 500 run Jacket –Tour De Puke
Biggest Hash Crash: Chief of Queef
Biggest Shit Show Moment: Orangubang
H5 AmbassaWhore: Spitz.cum
Best Trail (S.H.I.T.T.Y.est trail): Bushrat for Trail # 638. Mystery Trail to Centralia
Furthest Travelled: Visitors Cheap Thrills and Little Big Man from Ottowa
Most Shiggerific Trail: TMI#193: Big Ten Inch
Trail Fail of the Year: Scissor Me Timbers for allowing autoharing on Trail 664: New ‘s trail
Most Returning Virgins (Cherry Poppin Daddy): Wild Cherry
Most entertaining new virgin (Rookie of the Year): Gilligan, and the Skipper too..
Lifetime “Horse’s Ass” Mis-chievement: (for shenanigans and “misdeeds”): DeathWish
Lifetime “Golden Whistle” Achievement: (bringing goodness to the hash): Founder Trashed

Your H5 Mismanagement:

Asst GM-Chief of Queef
Hash Cash: She Came
Hare Raiser: Wild Cherry
Web Meister: Squeeze Me
Songmeister: Tour De Puke
RA: UpperCunt
ASST RAs: Fart ConnOr and Sharin’ Peters
Haberdasher: Anal Nicole
Awards Mistress: Fire in My Hole
Stinko Chief: Chappy
Hash Flash: Pork Your Parents
Thanks to all for attending and especially the people who helped make it all happen: Tour De Puke, LockJaw, Chappy, Dancing Fool, Sharin’ Peters, Fire in My Hole, Pork Your Parents, Ernest Hemingay, The members of Bubba, Just Astin, Sister Maria, Squeeze Me, phWedgie, Brown Noser, She Came, and Chief of Queef
On On to another Great Year.
Free 2 “did anyone get a look at the truck that ran over me last night” Lay

Barefoot Running

It seems like Barefoot “hashing” (avoiding the dreaded use of the “r” word) is sweeping the H5 discussion list. Many hashers are getting their Vibram Five Fingers and jumping on the bandwagon.

At the risk of sounding a little type-A, I wanted to post a few links for future reference for people that are looking to move to using this cool new trend in footwear. The reason being, that if you don’t really understand the reasons and methods for this trend… you do risk injuring yourself.

So here are some links to help you understand the reasons behind the trend.
Barefoot Running Essentials [Outside Magazine article]

Born to Run [book by Christopher McDougall]

Born to Run TEDtalk Video [by Christopher McDougall]

Barefoot running

Merrel’s Barefoot Running

H5 Happi Coats [orders due soon!]

H5 Happi Coats have been a popular item and it’s time to order a second batch of them. Don’t get stuck another 2 years without one. Happi Coats are a hashing tradition and it’s a great place to showcase all your patches you are bound to collect.

Show your “home hash” colors with pride
(ok, it doesn’t have to be your home hash. But it’s surely your favorite hash house 😉

Email ID To Get Yours Ordered Today!

Orders are being sent in very soon. Don’t delay

Sellinsgrove H3 New Years Day (in case you missed the email)

Date: 1/1/2011 (New Year’s Day)
Time: 2:00 pm (or 1400 hrs No Dimples), for Chalk Talk
Location: Play ground behind Citgo Station, Liverpool, PA
Hares: Bush Rat and Wet Dreams
Contact : Wet Dreams 570.809.0537 or reply to this email if you plan on attending, so we know how much beer to bring
Hash Cash : $7.00
Dog Friendly : On-In probably not
Bring a dry bag

Bush Rat thought splitting the difference between Selinsgrove and Harrisburg would be a surefire way to yield the most Hashers. If anyone is not fit to drive home, they are welcome to crash at my place (we will provide transportation to our house and back to your car the next day).

Have a great New Years celebration Wankers and Bimbos.

H5 Events Calendar on your Smartphone

First off… I have heard a number of frustrations about the way that events are listed on Believe me.. I hear you and I understand. I’ve had some issues with the plugin I had on the website that is limited in what we need it to do. I’ve tweaked and messed with it. So, I said eff it. There has to be an easier way.

So, I’m now embedding a Google Calendar on the page. So people should be more easily see what’s going on. They can go forward and backward. Events won’t disappear after the event begins.

I have the change posted now. Please take a moment and let me know if you see something odd.

What is even cooler with this calendar… if you are an iPhone user (not sure if other smart phones support this but I’m sure you can easily google it or check with your manufacturer)… You can add this calendar to your iphone calendar and you’ll always be up to date.

This also works with applications that support ICAL file format.

Here is the subscribed address for your device:

As far as how do you set this up on the iPhone… here are the directions I blatantly stole off some guys blog…

How to Subscribe to an iCalendar Server/.ICS feed [iPhone]
iCalendar is an older calendar subscription format, and many servers offer .ICS feeds of calendar entries. I particularly love TripIt‘s free travel itinerary service, which is available as an ICS feed. iPhone OS 3.0 also includes iCal as a supported protocol for over-the-air subscription, so you can view your ICS feeds right in your phone calendar. Note that iCalendar is read-only, like an RSS feed, so you cannot create or edit items on the phone.
1. copy this URL

2. ummm…
3. Go back to the home screen and select “Settings”
4. Select “Mail, Contacts, Calendars”
5. Select”Add Account…” under “Accounts”
6. Select “Other” at the bottom
7. Select “Add Subscribed Calendar”
8. Select the “Server” box and tap “Paste”
9. Select “Next”
10. Optionally modify the description


I’d like to thank the fine people at Pong Deck for sending me a set of their Pong Deck cards for our next “serious on-in”. These are pretty cool. It’s a deck of cards that are used to “enhance” the game of Beer Pong. We’ll have to sort out our rules and teams for next event!